Women Laughing Alone At Tom Martin (and his video project about “gold-digging women”)

Gold digger, 1933 model

Gold digger, 1933 model

This won’t be news to a lot of you — I’m a little late getting to it — but our old pal Tom Martin, the repulsive British MRA celebrity, is actually going ahead with the somewhat baffling video “women and comedy” project he was babbling about in the comments here many months ago, when he was still allowed to comment here. Well, “actually going ahead with it” this August if he can get anyone else to agree to work for him for free minimum wage.

The documentary project is called “Laughing with Women” and, Martin explains, it will “investigat[e] if gold-digging impairs women’s joke-making ability, and if, when women reject gold-digging in all its forms, they can become instantly funnier.”

In case that didn’t make sense to you — don’t worry, that’s a completely natural reaction — Tom explains his, er, “logic” a bit further in a jobs listing he’s posted in hopes of finding a crew, which has already gotten a good deal of ridicule over at PZ Myers’ and on at least one comedy website.

Why are women, on average, slightly less funny than men? Does gold-digging in particular impede women’s joke-making ability? When women publicly reject gold-digging, do they become as funny, or even funnier than men?

In his numerous visits to Man Boobz, Martin expounded at length on the topic of gold-digging women, generally referring to them by his preferred term, the shorter and blunter “whores.” Martin has previously estimated that roughly 97% of women fit this description, and has  suggested that female penguins are also whores. Frankly, once he gets going on the topic, it’s hard to shut him up, which is partly why he’s no longer welcome in the comments here.

In any case, this odd hypothesis will be tested, Martin says, with a “radical, and revealing street-based social experiment.”

Still puzzled? Mike Booth, the British video comedian behind SomeGreyBloke and Dan Cardamon, has managed to tease out a few more details from Martin (posting here as sexismBusters):

somegrey

Martin is confident that his proposed video will blow the lid off this whole “women and gold-digging and comedy, no really, they’re connected” thing:

If the radical, and revealing street-based social experiment at the centre of our documentary proves gold-digging does make women less funny (as pre-production research suggests) then our findings will make headlines around the world, our film’s two minute teaser trailer attached to all those news and blog articles (Update: this advert alone has already been blogged and tweeted about by outraged PC types).

The full documentary will be shot to a broadcast-quality standard and format, giving mainstream television companies worldwide the opportunity to purchase broadcasting rights (if they’re feeling brave enough) whilst we maintain a virtually guaranteed revenue stream from our already established hardcore of supporters and fans within the non PC gender equality field around the world, who, along with everyone else, will be able to enjoy Laughing with Women on newly launched pay-per-view channel, Vimeo on Demand (VoD) – where VoD itself takes a very modest 10% cut. The documentary has the potential to be translated into several languages – gold-digging a familiar if hidden story in every country, until now.

In other words, it sounds like some sort of video gold mine.

So I’d recommend that all gold-digging women out there try to get in on the ground floor of this Tom Martin dude.

Oh, and speaking of Dan Cardamon, here’s the faux MRA’s take on the project:

CORRECTION: This post originally stated that Martin wouldnt’ be paying his crew, but he says he will be paying them minimum wage, so I’ve corrected the relevant passage above.

EDITED TO ADD: Tom has shown up in the comments, and I’m letting his comments through (for now at least), so if you have any questions for him, feel free to head to the comments to address him directly.

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Posted on June 16, 2013, in $MONEY$, grandiosity, hypergamy, I'm totally being sarcastic, it's science!, ladies aren't funny, misogyny, MRA, somegreybloke, Tom Martin, whores, YouTube and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1,119 Comments.

  1. Ah, but if you’re Tom, the purpose of a sex toy is to be as much like a real human being as possible because real human beings refuse to have sex with you because you are terrible.

  2. HM said,

    “You know who doesn’t need studies to know how women respond in bed? Women. So when we see you prattling on with this stuff we just laugh at the deluded guy who has it all wrong, so wrong.”

    HM, female sex researchers – and male ones – would disagree with you there, arguing we need more studies about how women respond in bed. Daniel Bergner (2013) makes this point very strongly. Get with the programme.

    Women are horrible sexual communicators – and getting worse (Wolfe, 2013)

    The history of scientifically investigating the truth about female orgasm is statistically male-dominated.

    Women are wired differently to each other, their arousal different, where as men are wired more uniformly – so women, with little experience of trying to make other women orgasm compared to men, are not confronted with these differences, and therefore have not sought to investigate these differences with as much urgency as men.

    The most convincing sexual guru I have seen, runs a website called ideagasms – and is a man. He’s an expert at giving G Spot orgasms, telling and showing people that we have to ignore apparent discomfort on the part of the woman being manipulated to G Spot orgasm, even if she’s kicking her legs at you (which would be seen on the face of it as a signal to stop), you have to plough on, vigorously, to get there.

    Women’s Little Bo Peep Diploma training stops them from instructing men how to actually bring them to G Spot orgasm (if they even know) because the real advice is, “do it hard, and don’t stop”, not “moan, moan, yeah, yeah. I think I feel something.”

    How many more decades would we have to wait for a woman to break the news that they need to be blasted to have a G Spot orgasm?… and at the current trajectory, given women are becoming worse sexual communicators over recent decades?

    It’s easy for me to conduct research to discover if funny women have more orgasms for instance – and manboobzers are complaining about it.

    I’m just going to plough on HM – I get you’re upset at the prospect of men understanding female sexuality to the point where women can no longer demand financial recompense from men for the traditionally bad sex they’ve been managing to blame on men.

    Have orgasms with men, and pay your own way – it’s a win/win for equality – thanks to male and female sexologists, ploughing on.

    .

  3. RE: Tom Martin

    And there, from LBT, we have the classic “shooting the messenger” move, where LBT agrees, that showing nudity for free is good,

    I said no such thing. I said that I put up pictures of my now-dearly-departed boobs for free online. Earlier, I told you that the reason I did this was for educational purposes, to show the effects of major invasive surgery–a bilateral mastectomy. It wasn’t beneficial for ME–I personally would rather not have public topless photos of me at all–but it was for other people hoping to have surgery. Also, I never claimed to generalize my experience–I did it, but I certainly don’t think EVERYONE should.

    but then says she’d never show it to me (even though I am the one bringing the argument with which she agrees).

    No, I’m not giving them to you because you’re a skeeze and last I checked, you weren’t having a bilateral mastectomy, so you’d have no uses for those photos. ALSO I AM NOT A SHE.

    I’m the “worst human, 2012″ to manboobzers, because my arguments are the best.

    Whatever helps you sleep at night, Mr. In Debt.

  4. Misgendering LBT? Yeah, I think you need to hurry up with fucking off.

  5. Let’s be honest, though, with all the wrong Tom Martin carries around with him, expecting him to be right about my gender was a lost cause from day one.

    (Seriously though my chest is awesome. The Internet agrees with me on this.)

  6. Ally S,

    Now I know LBT identifies as male, I will refer to him as male. You appear to be trying to abuse me for being mistaken about someone’s gender. Interesting, but not surprising.

    Do you have anything to add to the actual debate?

  7. If Tommy wasn’t such a cheapskate, I’d bet the women he claims to have had sex with were sex workers, practised in doing whatever it took to get scumbags like him to come and go. Emphasis on the “go”.

    As it is, I’m more inclined to think he’s confused “woman” with “fleshlight”.

  8. Hey Tommy … Toommmmmyyyyyy … I told my boss (bloke, not a feminist) about you. Mentioning the LSE and chairs gets an “Oh that idiot!” and a gale of laughter, before he turns queasy when reminded of your pro-child-rape views, then another gale of laughter about female penguins being whores.

    See? It’s not just feminist women who find you contemptible, laughable and disgusting all at once.

  9. Kittehserf,

    I was a flair bartender in London and New York – Mr Right Place Right time – so never had to even think about paying for sex. When women are on heat, they get dressed up to go out, and it’s not about whether they’re going to have sex or not, it’s about who they’re going to have sex with. Working behind a bar, means women approached me – and the mere dynamic of this means women automatically rated me as more attractive. This dynamic has been measured in speed-dating experiments where the men get up and move round one, and are rated less attractive by the women who they approach than when the organizers make the women get up and move round one, who then become more wanton of the men, as they have become the pursuer of the men.

    When I had that debate at UCL, as the crowd arrived, I thought it would be a similar dynamic – women coming to see me, therefore some of them a bit up for it – but NO, NO, NO… it was more like hanging out at a lesbian bar, but not, because women at lesbian bars are actually extremely civil and even comely towards men because of the “lesbian” cover – but like the lesbian bar, the women’s union rules clearly state, no fucking or flirting with the enemy in the presence of fellow sisters – but at the lesbian gatherings I’ve been at, where women will absolutely not hit on me whilst other lesbians are around, they will hang around, and try to get me on my own after the sisterhood have dispersed, for a bit of divide and conquer – but now, with everyone feeling so connected to their online tribes on their phones, I think even when feminists are away from their union, on their day off, it’s still union rules – so feminist activists are probably off the menu for me. Lately, I tend to get living in the moment musicians and percussionists and independent-schooled or convent-schooled pragmatists with an informed no bullshit attitude who’ve read a book or two on feminism and just yawned at it for being anachronistic and amoral. Free spirits, in the moment. About 1 in 20 women fall in to this category – those women are normal to me. Beginning feminists can be corrected and perfected to become those women – I’m sure it’s a growing pool of talent, what with facts on the internet and all – and the manboobz effect.

    My last girlfriend was reading manboobz comments and she was astounded at how mentally
    devious and deficient you all seemed. Manboobz turned her into more of a men’s rights supporter than anything I said.

  10. Based on how broad the scope of Tommy’s pet project is getting, I think we can add ‘how to make a coherent documentary’ to the list of things he does not understand. For this reason, I can’t wait to see it!

    Tommy, do you still need a title?

    Whore of the Worlds
    Whore Weddings & a Funeral
    Troll 2

  11. Why do I have a feeling this “documentary” will end up looking more like that “pickup” video we discussed here a while back where the PUA filmed women as they nervously shuffled away from him?

  12. Kittehserf said,

    Hey Tommy … Toommmmmyyyyyy … I told my boss (bloke, not a feminist) about you. Mentioning the LSE and chairs gets an “Oh that idiot!” and a gale of laughter, before he turns queasy when reminded of your pro-child-rape views, then another gale of laughter about female penguins being whores.

    Kittehserf, tell more people. When I google “Tom Martin” (a common name) on my computer, I now come up as the number one listing. I don’t know if this is true for people searching outside the UK – or if its just an algorithm based on my typical searches on gender politics etc, on my computer. I used to be number two behind a photographer of the same name, but not any more motherfuckers!

    Tracy,

    Thanks for the film title suggestions.

    £200 to the person who comes up with the winning name.

  13. MDubz,

    I made a documentary at university, called The Greener Gender, where I argued that because pick up artists go in early without lavishing the women with gifts, that they are actually good for the environment – pitched the idea to PUALONDON, who hooked me up with AFC Adam, the UK’s top pick up artist, who for the documentary, dressed me up, and had me hitting on women in the daytime.

    I was actually trying to get blown out, by being overtly sexual, which was not thought to work for day game but I did it to make a spectacle and an ass of myself – but perversely, the women I hit on all went for it (even though I was 36 at the time and they were around 22).

    Hitting on women, and getting their telephone numbers is easy. AFC Adam confided in me, that in truth, you can learn everything you need to know to be a successful PUA in one hour. Just do it.

    I prefer it when women hit on me though.

    There might be a bit of hidden camera day game in this documentary, looking at women’s attempts to incorporate humour when picking up men – to see if men really are intimidated by funny women hitting on them.

    I think women trying to be funny and failing will still be sufficient for men to say yes – even if she’s quite ugly – as long as she’s direct. We like assertive highly motivated women. More blow jobs – everyone’s a winner.

  14. Yeah, what is the title of this thing? Is it still “Women and Funny”? Good luck with that.

    Though, as I said, it’s possible that he gets a lot of mocking attention and mistakes that for attention attention.

  15. Yeah, Tommy’s so desperate that any attention is better than no attention. Even when it’s him getting his (skinny) arse kicked out of court.

  16. Wow. Tommy loves our attention — a lot.

    “My last girlfriend was reading manboobz comments and she was astounded at how mentally
    devious and deficient you all seemed. Manboobz turned her into more of a men’s rights supporter than anything I said.”

    Yes. This didn’t happen. You’re kind of obsessed with this site, huh?

    Did you know you hate women? It’s too bad you claim to be hetero. Must be very exhausting.

    “I’m just going to plough on HM – I get you’re upset at the prospect of men understanding female sexuality to the point where women can no longer demand financial recompense from men for the traditionally bad sex they’ve been managing to blame on men.”

    Translation: I’m insecure about being a bad sex partner, so I’ll just pretend all women who have sex are so intent on golddigging, they can’t tell a bad screw from a good one.

    Jesus, dude. You’re unloading too much. Hold back some, is my advice. You’re transparent as a fucking jellyfish. You’re hang-up are painfully apparent.

  17. Whoops, correction: Your hang-ups are painfully obvious.

  18. This documentary, how many hours is it? Cuz you just keep adding shit.

    Someone add lesbians and lesbian bars to the list of things he doesn’t understand.

  19. Yes. That list of things he doesn’t understand includes the green movement:

    “I made a documentary at university, called The Greener Gender, where I argued that because pick up artists go in early without lavishing the women with gifts, that they are actually good for the environment – pitched the idea to PUALONDON, who hooked me up with AFC Adam, the UK’s top pick up artist, who for the documentary, dressed me up, and had me hitting on women in the daytime.”

    You silly asshat, no one here believes your bullshit.

  20. Wait, Tom Tom got paid to do bartending work? Doesn’t he realize how many women would be happier if he just tended bar for us for free? Your nation needs you to supply whiskey sours of middling quality, Tom.

  21. “Translation: I’m insecure about being a bad sex partner, so I’ll just pretend all women who have sex are so intent on golddigging, they can’t tell a bad screw from a good one.”

    Translation translation: Every woman Tommy’s ever tried to get to do teh secks said “Not even if you paid me” and it’s left him terminally confused.

  22. Tom’s a BAR WHORE, expecting money for work.

  23. “Translation translation: Every woman Tommy’s ever tried to get to do teh secks said “Not even if you paid me” and it’s left him terminally confused.”

    **immature giggles**

  24. “**immature giggles**”

    My work here is done. :)

  25. The most convincing sexual guru I have seen, runs a website called ideagasms – and is a man. He’s an expert at giving G Spot orgasms, telling and showing people that we have to ignore apparent discomfort on the part of the woman being manipulated to G Spot orgasm, even if she’s kicking her legs at you (which would be seen on the face of it as a signal to stop), you have to plough on, vigorously, to get there.

    So you admit you’re a wannabe rapist, Tommy? Fuck off, you fucking rapey asshat.

  26. Fistbump me, girl.

  27. Tom’s a wannabe (at least) rapist? Colour me surprised.

    Funny how the sex information I’ve read from an actual scientist and sex educator (thedirtynormal.com) totally contradicts everything Tom and his alleged guru (CITATION FUCKING NEEDED TOMMY) and all the other rapistwannabes says.

    Let me guess, his guru is some sort of PUA. I doubt it’d be Fartiste or Roosh, since the only orgasms they’ve any interest in are their own, and in Roosh’s case even that’s secondary to causing distress. In other words – even if said guru exists, he’s just as much a liar and abuser/wannabe abuser as Tommy himself.

  28. Shiraz – ::fistbump::
    :D

  29. Based on his posts, he ignores the discomfort of women — while referring to female orgasms as if they are a thing of myth and legend.

  30. Yeah, kitteh! :)

  31. Correlation is causation in this case (assuming Tommy’s ever gotten closer to a woman than rubbing up against her on the Underground).

  32. Fuck, I missed that comment. I wish he’d go back to hard chairs and female whore penguins, he used to be funny, now he’s just sickening.

    Any of the be-penis’ed who make a habit of inserting said organ into vaginae (I have no idea if that’s the plural) care to tell wannabe rapist that he’s wrong in practice as well as theory? Cuz Tom, you’re Very Very Wrong. Women are quite capable of “yes, I like that, more of that” or “I like [thing], let’s do [thing]“.

    And, you know, even if your partner isn’t? You aren’t compatible, get a new fuckbuddy, don’t just insist you know what she likes and continue ramming it into her after she tells you to stop BECAUSE THAT’S FUCKING RAPE!

    Oh and you may want to do some proper research, the existence of the mythical g-spot is far from proven. The clitoris definitively exists though and many women (and others with them) enjoy having them stimulated. Once you have permission to do so, and plenty can even tell you how they like said stimulation to occur!

    In short, I’m questioning whether you’re half as experienced as you seem to be claiming, or just a terrible lover.

  33. If you go into it with the attitude that a woman’s orgasm is your prize, you’re going to fuck it up every fucking time. If you think a woman’s orgasm is yours to have, you’re a fucking rapist. You fuck. If someone is kicking at you, you fucking stop, or you’re a fucking rapist.

    Tom, you’re a fucking rapist.

  34. Kitteh — now now, I’m sure he has female relatives he got hugs and such from when he was a wee one.

  35. That whole g-spot thing reminds me of Pell, the teenager who believes there’s such thing as a mature/vaginal orgasm. And even he wasn’t a fucking rapist.

  36. He’s a terrible lover, obviously, argenti.

  37. In short, I’m questioning whether you’re half as experienced as you seem to be claiming, or just a terrible lover.

    Not in the least experienced, I’m betting. Never been in the presence of a woman’s orgasm in his life, even if he has had sex.

    And he’ll never be any sort of lover, unless fapping counts. There’s no love in him.

  38. Is there a connection between the bit about “ignoring her apparent discomfort” and “seeking recompense for bad sex”?

    PS has Tom ever tried having sex on a hard chair?

  39. Argenti – well, “since he was about ten years old” then, ‘cos it wouldn’t altogether surprise me if Tommy’s creepslimery started manifesting really early.

  40. That “apparent discomfort” is telling, given the word’s two meanings. Apparent as in “it is apparent that,” meaning it’s clear and obvious; and apparent as in “I’m so incapable of seeing women as human that I can’t even accept the obvious signs of physical pain as being real.”

  41. Yeah, I took “apparent” to mean clear and obvious, didn’t think of the other meaning :/

  42. Right, it’s like someone who sticks pins in bugs, and says there is “apparent discomfort” (without really believing he’s causing pain to another living creature for his amusement).

  43. So me, I’m voting for voting Tom off the fucking island, never to comment again. My vote doesn’t count, but there it is.

  44. “They tell me this means a woman is in pain but I don’t see it at all. Those are just random vocalisations.”

    It’s right up there with that burn-in-hell piece of shit Descartes with his “animals have no souls and therefore can’t feel pain and therefore it’s perfectly fine and even amusing to torture them” foulness.

    (I’m assuming Descartes has since figured out how evil that thinking was, but his earthly self’s notions still fill me with rage.)

  45. cloudiah – yeah, I agree. Tommy just digs deeper into the pit every time he comments.

  46. Tom’s attempts to blame his lack of sexual skills on other people continue to amuse me.

  47. Tommy Boy: Thanks Pecunium, for all that info about consent. From what I’ve read, we’re covered.

    So you got consent, in advance; with a clear explanation of what was being tested. You told them their faces, names, etc. would be shown; and got secondary consent for that. You gave them contact information; and a timeframe in which they could withdraw their consent.

    You did all that?

    I don’t believe you. I think you are telling bald-faced lies

    Then again, I think this ever changing documentary (which you claim to be paying people for) is a myth. So I suspect any women who might have spoken to your lying ass, are pretty much safe from being part of you making a greater laughingstock of yourself than you have already done.

  48. Tommy: I suspect you look for google-boo too much. I opened a private window and it took three pages to get to your unsupported drivel in the Guardian about how there is not patriarchy because you think women dominate men in interpersonal relationships and that trumps social inequities.

  49. I don’t believe you. I think you are telling bald-faced lies

    I saw what you did there

  50. I made a documentary at university, called The Greener Gender, where I argued that because pick up artists go in early without lavishing the women with gifts, that they are actually good for the environment – pitched the idea to PUALONDON, who hooked me up with AFC Adam, the UK’s top pick up artist, who for the documentary, dressed me up, and had me hitting on women in the daytime.

    Oh good, you already made this one. So you can prove that it exists–and, bonus, prove how awesome you are at picking up chicks–by simply posting it and linking us to it. C’mon, should only take a second and it’ll help spread your message.

  51. and had me hitting on women in the daytime.

    I guess Tommy had to edit out the bits where the women hit him.

  52. Your regular “Wolfe, 2013,” seen all over the internet, is Naomi Wolf, yes?

    Still laughing at you.

  53. Oh gods, not that book! Talk about getting the science WROOOOOOOOOONG.

  54. Naomi Wolf??!!!?

    Gott im Himmel. How wrong can anyone plan to be!

  55. Naomi Wolf + TommySlime = warp speed into fractally wrong.

    Cap’n, Cap’n, the engines cannae take it!

  56. I only really skimmed the last batch of Tommy comments before letting them through and missed the rapey bit.

    I think, given that, and given his long history of assiness, that he’s earned himself banishment from this thread as well as from all others.

  57. ::tosses cap in air::

  58. Thanks David, I figured you probably missed it. Sorry about all the F-bombs, but it turns out that rapey asshats make me a bit angry.

  59. Argenti Aertheri

    Thanks David, and BYE TOM!

  60. I really won’t miss you. Ciao, and try not to be such an asshole!

  61. But what will Tom do now that he can’t come here to get his attention fix? The rage! The despair! The imaginary documentaries that he will now fail to actually make!

  62. Does this mean I won’t get paid for my title suggestions now? Dangit.

  63. This guy is so desperate for attention, it’s hilarious.

    I missed where I was supposedly “upset at the prospect of men understanding female sexuality to the point where women can no longer demand financial recompense from men for the traditionally bad sex they’ve been managing to blame on men.”

    The thing he’s not getting is that plenty of men understand female sexuality just fine. I’d count my partner among them. It’s not that difficult. Tommy, your behavior and obsessions, again, do not leave you looking to the outside world like an eternally curious autodidact who’s getting to the heart of important matters in his own way. You look like a guy so who’s more neurotic about not being good in bed than pretty much any other man in the English-speaking language. Is this what you want?

    I mean, I guess if he needs attention this bad even being seen as a laughing stock is technically what he wants. Tom, I am laughing at you for taking my queries to mean I am opposed to science examining female sexuality and human sexual response. And I guess I’m kind of laughing at you for being shit in bed, because…well when I keep talking about how you look to the outside world, I’m basically talking about that. A guy who wasn’t shit in bed wouldn’t be like this. You are positioning yourself to be the world’s best-known bad lover. So congratulations on the negative attention, you grinning little masochist.

    I don’t even know where to begin with the allegations that women seek financial recompense for bad sex? It’s too dumb for words. And yeah, this continually changing documentary sounds imaginary at this point.

  64. It takes talent to so completely wear out one’s welcome that even in a place where one has been granted a special dispensation; because the post was about you; you piss in the punch enough to get tossed on your ear.

    It was, however, pretty much inevitable. I’m sure he will (or has) tell all the world about his horrid treatment on his twitter.

  65. I like how after I said I was male, he just completely stopped talking to me. THANKS TOM.

  66. I just realized it would have been fun to totally swamp his documentary with androgynous people when he was trying to film.

  67. I like to imagine a fucking FLOOD of androgynous folks swarming the nightclubs.

    With David Bowie.

  68. One of my earliest pics of Louis was pinched from one of Bowie in a Paisley shirt … ::nostalgic sigh::

  69. “Tell me a joke to prove you’re funny enough to be on our show.”

    “You remind me of the babe…”

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