Let’s take another visit to the CreepyPM subreddit, where innocent souls post screenshots of the perfectly horrendous private messages they’ve gotten, sometimes on dating sites, sometimes not.
In this case, the recipient is a young black woman on OkCupid, the sender a white man more than twenty years her senior and 13 years out of her specified age range. He decides that the best way to overcome this age gap is to … mansplain and whitesplain to her about the history of Planned Parenthood.
And then there is perhaps the most awkward segue in the history of internet dating.
In the screenshot below, he’s red, she’s blue.
Directed by M. Night Shyamalan!
According to the recipient — no screenshot, alas — he followed this up with a classic bit of passive-aggressive sex nagging:
Take a chance, Ms. Free Love.
SPOILER ALERT: She didn’t.
You can read the original thread in CreepyPMs here.
And that is just the beginning of a wondrous little exchange between a self-described “nice guy” trying out some bad boy charm on a not-very receptive woman on OkCupid who nonetheless deals with his ridiculous assholery with aplomb.
Note to “nice guy.” You might want to reconsider some of your assumptions. And work on your typing.
I found this on the endlessly fascinating, if often deeply disturbing, CreepyPMs subreddit, one of Reddit’s few redeeming features. You can read the rest of the conversation here, and the CreepyPM post here.
So that’s the beginning to what has to be my favorite creepy convo I’ve seen posted to the Reddit CreepyPMs subreddit yet. I don’t want to SPOIL anything, but let’s just say that the pink lady in this conversation comes up with a rather unique way to send this dick-pic-posting male correspondent packing.
See here for the rest, and here for the Reddit thread. Oh, and don’t worry, you won’t have to look at his c*ck, or any other horrifying thing, and nothing else will be spoiled if you scroll down through all the pics. (You’ll get what I’m talking about in a second.)
So I’ve been poking around the CreepyPM’s subreddit again — it’s a place where people, mostly women, post screenshots of the creepy private messages they’ve gotten from anonymous weirdos — and I ran across this doozy from Omegle, an online chat program that links up random strangers.
This bit of passive-aggressive, cut-and-paste pervery was one anonymous fellow’s opening conversational salvo. (Click on the pic to see a larger, more readable version.)
Now, I’m no psychiatrist, but as someone who’s suffered from depression, I’m pretty sure that guilt-tripping random women on the internet into sending you pictures of their BOOBZ isn’t going to actually help to cure this depression.
But the fact is, this guy isn’t actually suicidal. He’s just made that bit up in order to con women — and evidently some underage girls — into showing him their tits.
How do I know? Because. as a couple of the regulars in the CreepyPMs subreddit have pointed out, he’s done this before, apparently many times, with the same sob story about “having a really crap week (my grandma died).” So either he’s lost several dozen grandmothers in the past couple of years or he’s lying. I’m going to go with the latter explanation. Occam’s razor and all.
So congratulations, dude, you’ve managed to define a new low in shitty online pervery. From now on, people will forever measured by your yardstick. As in, “well, that’s guy’s pretty pervy, but he’s not quit as pervy as the guy who pretended to be suicidal on Omegle to get girls to show him their tits.”
So I’ve been reading Reddit’s CreepyPMs subreddit a lot lately, where the recipients of bizarre and, well, creepy personal messages share them with the world. As you might imagine, some of the creepiest come from complete strangers on dating sites, like the following message received by a young woman on MeetMe, who put up a profile stating that she was looking for friends only (she already has a boyfriend) and that she would talk to anyone.
Well, one young man didn’t quite believe her, and sent this message:
He doesn’t judge, huh? That’s the most judgy non-judgemental message I’ve ever seen.
If you haven’t already checked out CreepyPMs, go take a look. You can lose hours in there.
Today I feel an irresistible urge to post music videos. Above, an awesome interpretation of a rock classic that is sure to get you PUMPED for the weekend.
Below, enjoy the silky voice of Phil Collins.
So I read a lot of creepy shit doing research for this blog. But the manosphere blog Random Xpat Rantings — slogan: “Contemplative dominance for the modern man” — seems to be trying to take creepiness to a whole other level.
In a recent post, blogger xsplat attempts to explain “How to make an attractive woman fall for you on the first or second date.” One of his hints: “If you are way into the girl, it will be way easier for her to fall for you.”
But what if you’re dead inside and can’t feel love? Well, have no fear, because xsplat has an answer for you: Pretend that the women you’re dating are your children!
If you don’t know how to feel love, here is a trick that will work for some, if you let it. Men naturally feel paternal love. Women are neotenous. Evolution is accidental, however the coincidence is meaningful. Women are neotenous because that arouses men’s paternal love. Use that to your advantage. Consider her as YOUR child. This will open up a flood of love for her. It’s ok – it’s not real incest – don’t be an idiot. It’s a trick you are performing in order to commune more fully. To love her more. To enjoy for yourself the great rush of love.
Also, I have a long history of doing this, again and again. It’s not just an accident in my distant past. It’s what I do. It’s what I did today. It’s a formula. It’s a formula that might very well work for you.
If you’re giving out dating advice and you have to specify “it’s ok — it’s not real incest” you should probably start trying to figure out just how your life has gone so terribly, terribly wrong.