Read this: Guys on OkCupid try to pick up surreal-text-spouting Twitterbot Horse_ebooks

hey, sexy, do u hav skype?

hey, sexy, do u hav skype?

I have Cloudiah to thank (again!) for putting me onto this amazing article about a devious prankster who trolls pickup artists and other lonely horny hearts with a fake OkCupid account … that replies to all come-ons with selections from the ouvre of the legendary horse_ebooks, “the surreal Twitter bot that streams nonsensical snippets of text. The result: dozens of conversations from horny men desperately vying to have sex with a robot.”

And yes, it’s as funny as it sounds, especially when the guys try to use their PUA magic to “game” this imaginary HB10 (Hot Babe 10) – or should that be HRH10 (Hot Robot Horse 10)? – only to receive responses like “VERY SOME VERY NO VERY SOME VERY CHANCE LITTLE CHANCE GOOD CHANCE LITTLE CHANCE GOOD CHANCE CHANCE CHANCE CHANCE , NAVAL” and “CHAMPION CHAMPION CHAMPION CHAMPION CHAMPION CHAMPION CHAMPION CHAMPION Corp. CHAMPION Corp. CHAMPION Corp. CHAMPION CHAMPION CHAMPION CHAMPION.”

And of course the guys keep trying.

(All this made me wonder if anyone had set up a Gertrude Stein_ebooks account, and … yes, someone has! FOLLOWED!)

Anyway, you all need to go read the post. Check out the Okc_ebooks Tumblr blog for more.

 

Posted on February 15, 2013, in awesome, creep-shaming, creepy, go read this, gullibility, irony alert, PUA and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. 97 Comments.

  1. Oh, and thanks Argenti too. I’m amazed scented candles and chairs are legal under the UN human rights convention, frankly

  2. So Rebecca Watson posts about a sixteen year-old atheist activist who endured harassment from her community when she forced them to take down a prayer banner (Jessica Alquist, who is my hero despite being six years younger than me) who was told on Facebook to post to Sexy Atheists and why that is wrong. (See here http://skepchick.org/2012/02/seeing-the-patriarchy/)

    And then someone calling herself a traditional women’s rights’ activist decides that the cause of men telling sixteen year olds to post to sexy facebook pages is caused by the lack of Patriarchy, because men will always be in charge. I have not read such a steaming pile of horseshit since… well, since the last time Manboobz updated.

    Here that is if you want:

    http://femininemystiquetwra.wordpress.com/2013/02/16/rebecca-watson-seeing-the-decline-of-patriarchy/

    My “favorite” bits were when she claimed that men will always be more powerful (tell that to the Na!) and that women were protected because they didn’t have to work outside the home, ignoring the fact that only applied to very few women in certain historical contexts and that there was an awful amount of work to be done in the home so that men could go out and work outside it.

  3. RE: Kittehs

    No, it’s just the concept of low-stress early twenties that boggles me. Like, intellectually, of course, I understand that most people don’t end up semi-homeless and batshit in a nail-studded crawl space at twenty-five… but part of me is like, “HOW DO THEY DO IT? WHAT IS THEIR SECRET?” (Like it’s a matter of, I dunno, putting the right cheat code into the Life Machine.)

  4. Ah, gotcha.

    I guess it starts earlier than the twenties to land someone in that situation, though … I guess the secret is that horrible things didn’t happen to them!

  5. To kitteh and LBT, I could always spot north shore boys (even into adulthood), there was always a sense of entitlement and confidence because no-one had ever pulled the ladder out from under them. I suppose they were right because the old boys network WOULD keep looking after them probably for the rest of their lives.

  6. Yep, apple bread is totally A Thing: http://www.yummly.com/recipe/Apple-Wheat-Bread-_bread-Machine_-Recipezaar

    I’m down to one egg before partner does the shopping, otherwise I would be making apple muffins instead. But all my apple recipes call for two large eggs. :(

  7. That’s very interesting about the confidence, Yoyo - I don’t think I gave it a thought about other people seeming entitled, because I didn’t think about other people that much (still don’t in day to day matters). Looking back I know I was brought up without any expectations of getting tertiary education, or a career rather than a job, and there was sure as hell no support network out there.

  8. Yeah, I dunno, there’s just this odd… security in some folks. Like they just KNOW it’ll never happen to them, and I’m always boggled that it’s never been challenged. (I mean, I used to be like that. But then I came out. It was all downhill from there.) It’s like, “How? How do you do it? How can I do it?”

  9. Kiwi Girl, I googled “egg substitute for muffins” and came up with a bunch of options - maybe one of them would work for you?

  10. Now that insecurity I do get, LBT. Even without having had anything horrible happen, I live with the fear (realistic or not) of homelessness hitting me one day, simply because I am fifty, on a low income, and don’t own a home. I seriously do not want to live to old age, because the poverty that could come with that is damnably frightening. (That’s quite apart from the fact I’d much, much sooner the time had come to go Home permanently.)

  11. :) I just baked a cake so I want to be lazy and use the breadmaker. I found, this and it sounds nice: http://www.food.com/recipe/apple-wheat-bread-bread-machine-357191

  12. PS “unstable housing” sounds like “living in an earthquake zone” more than anything else!

  13. I have a cat here who is

    demanding attention

    complaining when she gets attention

    running around hiding behind the furniture

    coming out and bashing me with her tail when I don’t chase her around the furniture

    purring and grumping simultaneously when cuddled

    starting it all over again

    … in other words, just bein’ a kitty.

  14. RE: Kittehs

    I can’t imagine anything close to that far in the future. I made it to twenty-five. I will find a way to continue as long as I can, and then one day, I won’t. My job is to extend that ‘will’ as far as it’ll go. (And retirement? Lolz. No such thing.)

    If nothing else, at least I’ll leave a lot of good stories behind me!

  15. Yeah, I wasn’t thinking of retirement age when I was in my twenties, for sure. But at fifty it does come to mind. I’ll work as long as I’m able, because the pension is way below the poverty line (though it’s still more than unemployment payments), but if I lose my current job, I’ll be in deep shit trying to find another. Unemployment’s rising fast in Victoria, partly because our fuckwit state government won’t spend any money on major projects or infrastructure - their “policy” is not to do so until next year, which is an election year. Unbelievably stupid … how can they not see that having a solid record of jobs creation is one thing most likely to get them reelected? They’re likely to get booted out because they’ve been totally do-nothing. Even the dreaded Jeff Kennett has said they’re hopeless, and they’re his party.

    OT here is a picture of the Attention Demanding Cat. It’s the only one I got this morning when she didn’t move her head exactly as I pressed the shutter!

  16. Aw, kitty. And yeah, I can hear the job fears. Our ma is/was (haven’t checked in while) a pharmaceutical rep, which in our country prefers the young. She was always in a panic about getting a job.

    My future is planned out as far as “move out by June. Also, make multi lecture in Ohio???” I AM GENIUS.

  17. Fingers crossed that the move goes well, and everything else, too!

  18. RE: Kitehs

    *laughs* I’ll have to find a place to move TO, first. But I’m sure it will!

    Also, OT but relevant to the boobzers here; I just read a book today that actually gave me the D: reaction. It was about child abuse (always cheery, I know, I should know better), with an extremely neglectful mother and physical/verbal abusive and neglectful father.

    The father was of course, the royal dick of the story, but at the end, the sixteen-year-old daughter (who was literally RUNNING THE HOUSE as best she could for a few months because the mother just LEFT and ran across the country) was told to be more understanding of her mom, because her mom was a victim too. Just… what? WHAT? This is a woman who literally LEFT HER CHILDREN alone, without money, without any resources for months, and we’re expected to just… forgive her?

    >:[ It just pissed me off is all. Freaking book.

  19. Yike! What was the title? I want to avoid it.

  20. I have a good safety network, but it’s not old boys or family friends or anything, it’s purely the efforts/luck of my parents. If they live they’ll be employed, which means they can give me monies as needed, and if they die I get monies for that. I like to think I don’t act entitled about it; the only time I’ve really gone limp and let the safety network catch me was when I depression-sploded wildly out of grad school and independent living into having to live at home.

  21. RE: Kittehs

    It was, “Don’t You Dare Read This, Mrs. Dumphrey.” A shame, because I actually kinda liked it, and could connect to it… but that ending, “Forgive the woman who DITCHED YOU BROKE AND ALONE WITH A SMALL CHILD TO CARE FOR,” thing really honked me off.

  22. @WordSpinner:

    I ran across that nut before on a facebook page (she used the same icon and everything) and I remember her bizarre and putrid notion that women and their children should BE OWNED BY MEN and that those men have the right to do whatever they want to them. I wish she were a troll but I think she’s serious. I’ve seen a few others like her and they were into 24 hr slave/dom type relationships but thought that would make a great norm. You know, because if they like living as human slaves then well, I guess all women should… ughh. Makes me ill.

  23. I am so sorry for my use of the word ‘nut’. I didn’t mean to hurt anyone’s feelings and would remove it from the comment if I could. If it makes anyone feel any better I am not neurotypical myself plus I am pretty wasted on wine right now and probably should have waited to type until I had cooled off. That lady makes me want to bang my head into a brick wall.

  24. Argenti Aertheri

    Insert wing before your nut and it works, she’s certainly a wingnut :)

    …I just dropped my phone, nearly in the garbage, when my pill reminder dinged >.<

    I’m throwing shit and can barely type since my fingers have gone from screaming at me and my violin to just plain numb — g’night guys!

  25. RE: themisanthropicmuse

    Oh god, I’ve run into those 24/7 TPE evangelists. They scare the living shit out of me. MY KINK IS NOT YOUR KINK. I’d rather be free to LEAVE my partner, kthxbai.

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