The Angriest Spearheader? The Wit and Wisdom of Darryl X
It’s back to the caves for you, ladies!
There are a lot of hair-raisingly reactionary dudes on The Spearhead, but perhaps none quite so hair-raising as the prolific commenter who calls himself Darryl X. Here are some of his pearls of wisdom, taken from a recent Spearhead thread. (Many of his comments in the thread were devoted to a sort of mini-vendetta against another Spearhead commenter, Andie, who had committed the crime of commenting while female; I’ve cut out most of that to focus on Darryl’s more timeless thoughts.) Fair warning: This is extreme stuff, even by Spearhead standards.
Since the solution for the past forty-four years was to kill and impoverish and exile and imprison men and steal their kids, I’d say sending women to live in a cave is a generous trade.
All women are feminists because all women (without a single exception) have benefited excessively from the legal, political, social and financial machine that feminists have created. And those benefits have all come at the expense of the lives and livelihoods of tens of millions of men and children (in the US alone). When all my financial resources and children which women stole have been returned to me and all women are living on the street to pay for it only then will there be fairness.
Feminism is a hate movement. It is a campaign of hate against men and children. And all women are evil until feminism has been destroyed and every women pays back repairations with interest. …
This is a war. And it will end only one way. The complete utter destruction of feminism and the women who participated in it and/or who sat by passively at let it happen. I have absolutely no sympathy and will demonstrate no mercy for any woman until I and other men have been compensated and women and feminists have been punished for their egregious crimes against humanity (preferably with death sentences). This is a war that women started and it will not end until every one of them has paid. …
Why Andie Must Pay for the Crimes of All Women
She’s a woman. She benefited from feminism more than any man. Even if she represents 20% of women who are not psychopaths, she must be compelled to take an active part in the destruction of feminists and feminism. … She must pay for her complicity … The consequences of her failure to stop feminism must be greater than the retaliation by feminists. Otherwise, there will be no incentive for women to help men. This is a war. If you aren’t fighting feminism and feminists, then you are helping them. Stopping feminism is fundamental to maintaining civilization.
Women are herd animals. … Women are much easier to control and manipulate than boys … Boys have to be drugged. Girls come pre-drugged.
Women have choices. If they want rights and privileages, then they must have responsibilities. Presently, women vote. But they are not held accountable for the consequences of their choices when they vote. Most men have no choices. If they want to live. Women are not women today. They are whores. Big difference.
Women and feminists are opportunists. They are … looking for someone else at whom to point fingers of blame and cast aspersions and pick up the tab as they now understand that responsible men have nothing left to steal. They’re just looking for the next host on which to parasitize.
We’re Still Hunting the Mammoth to Feed You
[M]ost of the taxes that men are currently paying fund the excessive lifestyles of women … [M]en do all the work and women do little or nothing.
I have been actively fighting feminism for more than thirty years. I have racked up quite a list of those who have made the mistake of getting in my cross-hairs. … Many a feminist federal employee and university professor have watched their careers and their lives come apart after picking a fight with me. … I don’t have television or cable or internet and cell phone or land line or refrigerator or microwave. Hunting feminists is my hobby.
Unhappy hunting!
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Posted on September 23, 2012, in antifeminism, armageddon, evil women, grandiosity, harassment, hate, ladies against women, men who should not ever be with women ever, misogyny, MRA, oppressed men, reactionary bullshit, the spearhead, woman's suffrage and tagged anti-feminism, men's rights, misogyny, MRA, mras, patriarchy. Bookmark the permalink. 270 Comments.
Yeah, I’ve known a lot of long haired, tattooed, motorcycle riding, recreational drug taking “bad boys” in my life, and there’s not a single one of them (even the big scary-looking Hell’s Angels guy who sold speed at clubs and hung out with Motorhead) who I wouldn’t feel safer around than I would around any MRA who I can think of.
Checking the definition here: so if I think “gosh he looks nice”, I consider that attraction. No thoughts or imaginings about sex need to occur. Have I got the definition of attraction wrong?
I think there’s a difference between “he is attractive” and “I am attracted to him”. Or at least there is for me. There are a lot of people who’re objectively attractive who I’m not attracted to because they’re just not my type.
“I am attracted to him” implies that if there were no possible complicating factors or reasons not to (and there can be lots of those), I’d probably want to have sex with him. “He’s attractive” does not imply that at all, it’s just a recognition that the person fits current societal beauty ideals.
I agree with the attracted TO vs attractive definitions. I see attractive people all the time. But there are certain people who I just go WOW- MAGNETISM! I’ve had this happen with all sorts of people, mostly people who others find unremarkable and don’t see what I see. I have a really wide variety of people who seriously WOW-MAGNETISM me.
With my husband, the “limerance” phase of our relationship seriously lasted about 2-3 years. I seriously felt like I was magnetically attracted to him- I wanted to be always touching him in some way, I was so physically drawn to him that I could barely contain myself. And he felt the same way. It was very intense.
To me, that’s what attraction to a person feels like.
Those comments are interesting. Thanks for writing them.
BWAHAHAHA I’d be saying “get in the queue” because some of my girlfriends sigh over him too. He’s kinda baffled by it, lol.
I just Googled Mandy Patinkin; he was in Chicago Hope, not St Elsewhere, apparently. I never saw either, I was into ER. How cool is this, too: he’s a tenor and noted interpreter of Stephen Sondheim’s works.
Nothin’ sad about having a crush on Tom Baker’s Doctor! And that’s gorgeous about knitting the scarf. I’ve just taken up knitting over the last coupla months. I’m trying to do a jumper for Mr Kitteh … it’ll get done but NOT in time for his birthday, dammit! (Which has nothing to do with sitting here posting comments on Manboobz instead of knitting, nooo…)
You too, hey?
LOL just came back from doing a couple of rows of crochet for my partner’s mum, it’s her Xmas pressie. It’s the first time I’m carrying colour in crochet. I’m still learning this, so my tension is a bit tight. The pattern is here: http://wittylittleknitter.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/Vannas-Choice-Season-14.png all in garter stitch. Because I can’t have wool touch my skin, I’m using acrylic hence the choice of yarn. Hoping for 10 feet of scarf. The website also has a pattern for tardis socks.
Chicago Hope was a great show. I went through a phase of watching hospital-based stuff while I worked in one, although my favourite was a British comedy called Surgical Spirit: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surgical_Spirit_(TV_series) and I’ve been enjoying Nurse Jackie.
Maybe the MRAs should take up a constructive hobby.
Darn, I meant the pattern for the Dr Who scarf, not the pattern for the afghan. The afghan will look like this, but I need to do more repeats because of my tension: http://www.herrschners.com/product.aspx?sku=201348&sk=afghan+
That’s a very nice afghan - what colours are you doing yours in?
Brain bleach!
@Magpie it comes as a kit with the colours already chosen, so it’s a little more to the green end of teal than I think shows on my computer monitor. Blue is her favourite colour, I figure teal is close enough. Plus she loves anything hand made, so even if the colour is slightly off she’ll still really appreciate the present. I just can’t believe how cheap these kits are compared to the equivalent cost of me buying similar in New Zealand.
The teal looks nice in the picture. That is very cheap for a kit! Is it pure wool, or does working with wool make you itch? 2ply is really fine, it would make a soft fabric even with tight tension.
I’m knitting a V neck cardie - I’m up to the annoying bit where you decrease neck and armhole at the same time but different rates.
Wool is fine for me to work with, I have issues with it touching my bare skin on my neck or elbows due to allergies. The afghan yarn is acrylic, and it’s quite a nice one to work with. The American yarn terms are quite different to how we’d call them in NZ or Aus, so the yarn is equivalent to double-knit in our language. They’re really into doing the numbers for the yarn type, or use terms such as “worsted” which is the same as our 10-ply and I think is a 4 in weight /sigh. With crochet, I also have to worry about whether the pattern is North American or not, as the stitches are called something different in English-based patterns, e.g. I think English treble crochet is the same as American double crochet.
I feel your pain with the difference in row counts. I write down all the row changes for each different bit on paper. I grabbed an equivalent free version for Android but I can’t be bothered having to turn my phone back and lose battery life, so it will continue to be the paper-based method for me. I also thought that using PDF patterns on a tablet would be useful, but found that it kills the tablet battery really quickly, so still printing off paper copies of patterns.
Will you post a photo of the finished cardie? Are you on Ravelry?
Yeah, there’s a lot of conversion to do between US and Aus / NZ patterns and wool and hook sizes. My mate gave up on the whole exercise, and gets someone else to do a sample of the pattern and she copies the work.
I haven’t tried writing the rows out, just going at it like a bull at a gate and adjust it next row if I stuff up. Not a very good knitter, me
I’m not on Ravelry.
Ooh, are we talking about knitting now? I’m currently in the middle of two projects: a cardigan for my best friend and a sweater for my brother. Though I’m stuck on the cardigan’s sleeve at the moment because its pattern makes no sense: The first row of increasing I was to make one stitch at the start and one at the end, but the instructions after that are to “increase one stitch as before every following sixth row.” So do I only make one stitch? And at the beginning or the end?
Oh, knitting. How I both love and loathe thee. I never thought I’d even work my way up to a cardigan, but my friend wanted one so badly he sought out a pattern book for my Christmas gift and then pointed out the one he wanted.
Ooh, knitting talk! I volunteer at an animal shelter, and I’ve been churning out “Cork Fish” to sell at the annual Xmas bake sale. I’ve only got purple yarn left, though, and I’m getting pretty tired of the color - hooray, excuse to go to the yarn store!
Also, it’s getting cold here (Boston), so I’m going to try my hand at these fingerless gloves. Wish me luck…
Oh god, I have so many projects I’m not knitting. A hat for my sister (nearly finished, I need to do matching mittens), fingerless gloves for me, a blanket, and socks that only need about an inch more of work.
I’ve been working on the fingerless gloves because I could use some now that the weather is getting colder and the yarn is so soft. It’s a merino, but the softest merino I’ve ever worked with. I have another skein, and I’m thinking matching hat. I did finally get to wear my double-knit purple-and-pink hat I knit last spring, so that made me feel happy. Wearing knits is the best.
Hi Rogan! Yeah, I only recently started posting here.
Wow, fear the feminist knitting circle!
@lauralot89 those instructions seem odd, normally sleeves are two stitch increases each time, otherwise the seam will shift off to the side. Does it tell you how many stitches you should end up with, and repeats, so you can work it out? Grrr errors in patterns.
@emilygoddess those are so cool, I’ve not seen those gloves before. Will you post photos on Ravelry when you’re done?
@wordsp1nner that sounds great. I have so many projects in my queue because I see the pattern online and then buy the yarn to make it… you should see the spare wardrobe! I made fingerless gloves out of Zhivago acrylic for my partner (http://www.ravelry.com/patterns/library/zhivago-stocking-stitch-fingerless-gloves) which are really neat and took me less than a weekend to make. I also made him this crochet hat (http://www.ravelry.com/patterns/library/crochet-angry-bird-hat) - all her patterns are free and she posts videos on YouTube so you can see how they’re made.
So if David wants anything for his kittehs, it looks like he can do requests.
“I don’t have television or cable or internet and cell phone or land line or refrigerator or microwave. Hunting feminists is my hobby.”
… sooo, if he doesn’t have internet or phone or a cellphone HOW is he able to post these wackadoo articles? He just *thinks* really hard or something? o.O
@Kiwi girl: I’m starting with 64 stitches and ending with 104, but it doesn’t list the number of repeats, only that I’m meant to increase every six rows. I can’t tell if they want me to increase a stitch on the beginning, then six rows later increase one on the end, and so on, or if they want two each increased row.
@lauralot89: Increase at each end of the row (ie 2 stitches total). When you get to 104 stitches you will be close to the armhole.
Late to the party with this but OMFG I personally would really like to see the “women have it SOOOOOOOOOOOO EASY, because vaginas” meme die a painful meme death already. I’ve known plenty of fat, conventionally unattractive men who’ve also tended to have swaths of ease attracting lovers - some of them were even particularly unpleasant people and plenty of gorgeous, sweet young women who’ve had a really hard time even getting a “just as friends” date to a dance.
Dating comes easily for some people, and is really hard for others. But one thing that absolutely will NOT make it any easier for you is being irrationally angry at the bulk of your preferred gender because you think they have some kind of unfair dating pool advantage over you. Dating is tough, but bemoaning how HARD it is for you isn’t really a good way to get dates. It’s actually a good way to lose friends because they eventually get sick of your incessant whining.
And while we’re on the topic of bemoaning the lack of stars to fuck, seriously, I could EASILY turn that bullshit about Brad Effron and whoever else right back around on whiny “incels” and the like with all their talk about how “limited” their options are, and yet they STILL insist they have to be attracted to someone in order to fuck them, even though they claim their “incel” status is the worstest thing ever and OMFG their penis is going to fall off and they will DIE from lack of sex. I’m not saying anybody has to lower their standards, if you like what you like and won’t like anything else, fine (though in a culture that generally emphasizes and demonizes certain kinds of beauty, I DO think it’s fair to question how much someone actually likes the culturally deemed “attractive” bodies, as opposed to how much it is that that’s just what they think they should like) but for fuck’s sake, if you have standards, it’s only fair (not to mention fucking common sense) to assume that other people in the world probably have standards as well. Possibly even unique ones!
Not to mention, in my experience, the guys who bemoan that women only go for “bad boys” (which is a whole other level of “WHAT THE FUCK?” for me because, seriously, are we in fucking eleventh grade?) are douchebags. You don’t have to have tattoos or a motorcycle to be a “bad boy”. Some of the biggest douchebags I’ve met in my lifetime have been khaki’s and argyle sweater vest wearing, self-described “Christian men” who’s use of the term “bad boy” has been in reference to “dude a girl I like is dating who isn’t me”.
Sorry for the rant folks, but I don’t knit, so I can’t share any knitting stories.
I wish I could knit.
Is it hard to learn? Is crocheting easier or harder? I’ll need a new hobby once I’m done with my thesis.
Just popped into this thread, saw lauralot’s comment, and immediately thought she’d been in a horrible accident.
@cloudiah I always thought I could never learn to knit because I have the WORST spatial sense, but it ended up coming really easily to me - if one person’s testimonial is worth anything. You can make a lot of things by just learning the two basic stitches (one of which is the reverse of the other) and following pattern directions. It helps that knitting is very popular right now, so the Internet is full of videos demonstrating the various stitches, and there are IRL knitting groups popping up everywhere. Now is a very good time to learn!
@katz: Oh god, sorry about that! I assure you I’m in perfect help, no accidents knitting or otherwise (seriously, I’ve had a knitting accident before; I once had a fairly deep stab wound from a knitting needle).
@Magpie: Thanks! I figured that;s how I should go about it.
@cloudiah: You should definitely give knitting a try if you’re curious! There are several different methods of knitting, so even if one is discouraging, chances are there’s a way that will work for you.
Darn time zones! I’ve missed most of this knitting conversation and now I have to go out! Grrrr!
Cloudiah, I found knitting easier to take up than crochet. Lasted one day in a crochet class, lol. Mind you I’ve only done very basic stocking-stitch and moss stitch stuff so far (one plain, one purl) and I still have to do that carefully … I ended up with a partial row of rib in hte middle of it last night!
Maddening. Mr Kitteh’s said he doesn’t care, he likes the jumper anyway (lucky it’s a dark wool and shouldn’t show too much - and I think his hair’ll cover that bit anyway, it’s near the shoulder.)
Despite which stuff-up - it’s not hard to learn the basics, and work up from there. My real challenge will be cable, which I would really like to try eventually. Love cable knits.
Well, I have to go out now - and do some KNITTING on the train!
PS Jumper = sweater in Oz parlance, it doesn’t mean a pinafore dress or something like that as I think it does in US usage.
Kiwigirl, I just signed up for Ravelry.
The Kitteh’s Unpaid Help and assorted Manboobzers:
My username is WordSpinner if you want to friend me on Rav. We could have a Manboobz on Rav group to talk about all the knits we’re misandristically denying the men in our lives. Even if we are men.
Yes, darn the difference in time zones, only just got in from work. I agree that knitting is easier than crochet, but that could be because I’ve knitted since I was 13 and I’ve only seriously tried crocheting for about a year, so I have much less practice.
I’m Kiwi-pally on Ravelry.
For those learning knitting or crochet, I recommend this site as a great source of help with forums etc, and also there are groups and you might be able to find some local people to socialise with, preferably with tea and cake.
I’m LouiseKit on Ravelry!
For a dude with no internet he sure does write a lot on the internets.
I can’t crochet at all. I can do basic knitting, but the repetition is hard on my joints. My partner does crochet, and uses a visual pattern. I will see if there is some utility which converts/makes them, because she swears by them; they aren’t confusing.
I’m finding I can’t do too much knitting at a time, because it gives a very RSI-ish feeling in my right arm, so I can well understand how the repetition would hurt anyone with joint trouble. My arm’s a bit tingly-numb right now, hence doing a bit of computer stuff for a change (change, ha … I do more of that than knitting).
I haven’t encountered visual patterns - must see if they exist for knitting as well as crochet. Translating Knitting Pattern Language to something I can understand is the trickiest part for me, so far. And figuring out how many balls of yarn I’ll need, since the type in the pattern is never one that I’m buying!
Funny, I’d count crochet as easier than knitting because I learned to crochet (basic stitches) but I wasn’t able to learn to knit. (Probably could if I tried again.)
I wonder if I’d find crochet easier if I tried it again. But for now, getting past the basic stitches in knitting is challenge enough.
I ended up with a partial row of rib in the middle of moss stitch - probably just from forgetting to bring the wool forward on one stitch - and didn’t notice until I’d done a heap more rows.
AAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrgghhhhhhhh
Thank goodness Mr Kitteh isn’t fussed.
(I think I already wrote about that … brain fog. Or brain fade.)
Knitting and crochet seem to occupy similar spaces in the brain. Most people I know do one, or the other, but not both (my mother is a both, she also tatts, but bobbin lace she refuses).
I’d love to make lace, though I have no real use for it! The great laces of the seventeenth century make me go all wobbly just looking at them. (Think the period of Van Dyck’s portraits, those sort of lace falling bands and cuffs.)
The deal with the patterns is the require a system; Japan has one, and there are people who are adopting it. It takes a CAD program (or similar) to make them, but they are compact. I’m told the single sheet which is being used for the shawl requires something like 27 page to write.
That kind of lace, the 17th century stuff, can’t be made any more because of child labor laws.
Interesting - all the images I’ve seen of lace-makers of the time are of adults, though I suppose like most crafts one started learning it very early.
Actually, Cloudiah, that’s exactly how it works. And thanks, Dave, for allowing me to post. Angry? Yes. But I have a good reason. The angriest. I dunno. I know a lot angrier. I would never do anything violent. But I do how to affect a change for the better concerning many innocent men in the same circumstances I am in.
Almost all men in prison for child support arrears are too poor to comply with the orders. And the Bradley Amendment prevents any order for child support from being reduced.
During the past forty-four years in the US, approximately one-third of adult men (~32-million) have been ordered to pay excessive child support. Approximately 17% of adult men currently are ordered to pay excessive child support and approximately 8.5% currently are in arrears. Approximately 10% of adult men currently eligible for work (ie. not retired) are in arrears. (That’s the percent of adult men minus the percent who are not eligible for work because they are retired.) Before decline of the economy began accelerating in 2007, approximately one-quarter of men ordered to pay child support were or had been in arrears. Since acceleration began, approximately one-half are. At the end of 2011 for example, 70-80% of obligors in the states of Ohio and Illinois were in arrears and more than 42% in the state of New York were.
Almost all men support their children the best they can without interference by the mothers or the governments. Only a very tiny percent of men who owe child support (of approximately thirty-million during the past forty-four years) deliberately refuse to pay but because they have been forcibly separated and alienated from their own children. Approximately ten-percent of all child support obligors (almost all men) are not even the real fathers for whom they pay child support. Another six-percent for whom arrears continue to accumulate are in fact dead. Most people are unaware of the considerable abuses of our family court and child support enforcement industries.
If you had a great-paying job and your child support was calculated and ordered as a function of that great-paying job, you can’t get your child support lowered because of the Bradly Amendment. Then the judge orders you to jail because you go into arrears. Approximately fifty-thousand men currently are in prison for child support arrears. During the past forty years, approximately one-quarter million have been. Almost all of them are unable to pay.
I’ve been in jail even though I’m paying ninety-five-percent of what I owe every year. Of $30,000 a year. For two children. A little excessive don’t you think. Even in a good economy, these measures are draconian. But in a bad economy they are downright tyrannical. Imagine losing contact with your children and then being forced to pay more than 80% of your take home pay (going into arrears the other 15%) for your ex-wife to commit adultery and then being ordered to jail because you cannot afford to pay the other 15%.
And then imagine getting to retirement age and an age which you cannot work anymore and then being condemned to the street because you have no money left. Not a very good life for someone who has never committed a crime and who has made significant contributions to civilization and the sciences and technogy. And does not get to benefit at all from the public assistance programs to which I made a disproportionately great contribution and others did not but still get to benefit. As the US continues on this way, it will ultimately discourage anyone who actually support civilization from ever contributing. And then civilization will devolve. Rapidly. It’s happened many times before throughout history. There’s nothing different now to prevent it from happening again. And slavery is a very inefficient way to coerce labor from men.
So, according to the census bureau, there are about 70 million fathers in the US. 25 million live as part of a married couple with their children. 2 million are single fathers. It’s unclear how many fathers of adult children there are (I can’t find the data on parenthood published separately), but let’s estimate that for every one living with their children currently there’s another with adult children. (I figure that, on average, people start dealing with the deaths of their parents in their 40s, so fathers spend about the same amount of time living with their children as they do surviving after their children are adults.) So, 32 million non-custodial fathers is, I guess, almost reasonable.
But for your numbers to work, all of those fathers would have to be paying excessive child support. So the question is, is there any amount of child support you would not consider excessive?
Darryl, in the original thread, you tore into Andie for daring to suggest that you were angry. You called her a “typical woman” for thinking you might have an emotion, and used her attempt to empathize as a reason to dismiss and demean her. Now you come over here say “sure I’m angry, and I have good reason”. Do you get a kick out of screaming at women who are trying to befriend you, or were you trying to impress the other men by beating your chest like a caveman, or what?
“Imagine losing contact with your children and then being forced to pay more than 80% of your take home pay (going into arrears the other 15%) for your ex-wife to commit adultery and then being ordered to jail because you cannot afford to pay the other 15%.” — Darryl-X
Actually you are being ‘forced’ to pay for your children’s livelihoods (schooling, clothing, food, etc.) The fact that you believe that the money is paying for your ex-wife to have sex with other people (it’s not adultery if she’s your ex wife!) makes me think that you are irrational and probably not really a good custodial parent anyway. It also calls into question your honesty when I look at your self-reported percentages of what you pay to so that your kids won’t starve.
What exactly counts as “excessive” child support may I ask?
And what alternative do you suggest to child support? If parents of children separate, it is only fair that the parents both still contribute to their upkeep.
Otherwise you will end with children living in needless poverty.
What other system do you suggest? I have no doubt that the current one is not perfect, no system is. But I cannot see what system would work better.
You seem to resent paying the child support, however how can you resent paying for your children to heat, to be warm, to have a roof over their heads and to have clothes and shoes that fit.
Most parents spend the vast majority of their income on these things anyway, children are expensive, that’s just how it goes, and you can’t give that up simply because you are not with the mother of your children any more, you are still their father and they are still your responsibility.
I knew a divorced man who made a reliable six figures in an all-cash business. Because the income he actually reported was extremely low, his child support payment was only $25 per month. And all he ever talked about is how he’s forced to pay his ex-wife to have sex with another man. (Nevermind that they were divorced, and that HE had a girlfriend. The fact that the ex-wife was also seeing someone else apparently constituted “adultery” in his mind.)
@Amused and again there we see that this is really about controlling “their” women and children and the feeling of rage engendered by ‘that b*tch taking MY MONEY” and making her own choices with it. And they wonder why their wives left them and got custody. Ugh.
Forget child support. It’s like arguing with a rabid anti-Semite, who laments that “Hitler didn’t finish the job,” over the limits of religious tolerance. This is a man who said any woman who identifies as a feminist, or any woman how has in any way benefited from feminism, should be executed. That includes me, every woman in my family, and every other woman who has ever voted, had a job other than secretarial or customer service, enjoyed anesthesia while giving birth, or went to college (to study anything besides home economics). His original post also includes threats, implicit in the statement that anyone who has ever had the temerity to argue with him in the past had her life “come apart”.
There is no room for “dialogue” with someone who wishes you dead, along with your mother, grandmother, sisters and daughters. There is no room for “dialogue” with someone who is only willing to back off the execution talk as far as you being reduced to chattel with no rights and no recognized status as a human being. And I don’t care how “angry” he is. In the end, rational human beings choose what they want to become regardless of how well or how badly the world has treated them. He’s certainly made his choice.
@Amused:
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@Amused
But, but, didn’t you read his missive? He’s not a violent man! He would never hurt anyone! I totally believe him too. *checks that it’s difficult to link this account with my meatbag*
Well put. I’m willing to talk with MRAs who think Bradley should be amended and/or the child support system improved. I’m not willing to talk to anyone — MRA or not — who considers his ex-wife and children as nothing more than property he’s been “deprived” of, or who thinks all women should be dead, imprisoned, or completely subjugated to men.
Citation needed. Seriously.
The last case to come out of the Supreme Court regarding contempt for non payment of child support had a good point about ensuring that the rights of the noncustodial parent were respected. In that case, the judge did nothing to inquire about the father’s changed economic circumstances. Even then the man was spending all of the money he did have on drugs. I actually know that drug addiction is an illness and should be treated-which means that he should have sought treatment and then used whatever money he could to pay for his children’s care. The man should have also brought all paperwork from his lack of a job, his lack of being hired (many employers send letters of rejection), and other ways of showing he was unable to pay the same amount he could when working.
Here is Florida’s way of seeking to have your child support order changed.
Here is Washington State’s pamphlet on it.
This information is easy to find and use. At some point it stops being “oh the poor man is being screwed by the system” and becomes “this man is willfully refusing to live up to his obligations.” Even the world’s most patient judge will get tired of a person who makes zero effort to help themselves.
You may have not read anything on this page before but we check and verify crap you spout..
THIS is the Bradley Amendment.
In it is says:
(10) Review and adjustment of support orders upon request.—
(A) 3-year cycle.—
(i) In general.— Procedures under which every 3 years (or such shorter cycle as the State may determine), upon the request of either parent or if there is an assignment under part A of this subchapter, the State shall with respect to a support order being enforced under this part, taking into account the best interests of the child involved—
(I) review and, if appropriate, adjust the order in accordance with the guidelines established pursuant to section 667 (a) of this title if the amount of the child support award under the order differs from the amount that would be awarded in accordance with the guidelines;
(II) apply a cost-of-living adjustment to the order in accordance with a formula developed by the State; or
(III) use automated methods (including automated comparisons with wage or State income tax data) to identify orders eligible for review, conduct the review, identify orders eligible for adjustment, and apply the appropriate adjustment to the orders eligible for adjustment under any threshold that may be established by the State.
(ii) Opportunity to request review of adjustment.— If the State elects to conduct the review under subclause (II) or (III) of clause (i), procedures which permit either party to contest the adjustment, within 30 days after the date of the notice of the adjustment, by making a request for review and, if appropriate, adjustment of the order in accordance with the child support guidelines established pursuant to section 667 (a) of this title.
(iii) No proof of change in circumstances necessary in 3-year cycle review.— Procedures which provide that any adjustment under clause (i) shall be made without a requirement for proof or showing of a change in circumstances.
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What does that show? Why it shows that the orders can be MODIFIED.
Nothing in that says that the amounts cannot be reduced-in fact it says that it should be reviewed to see if it needs to be changed. And it goes on to say “hey, bring the proof dummy.” Well okay not that specific wording but it should.
Oh and lookee here:
(15) Procedures to ensure that persons owing overdue support work or have a plan for payment of such support.— Procedures under which the State has the authority, in any case in which an individual owes overdue support with respect to a child receiving assistance under a State program funded under part A of this subchapter, to issue an order or to request that a court or an administrative process established pursuant to State law issue an order that requires the individual to—
(A) pay such support in accordance with a plan approved by the court, or, at the option of the State, a plan approved by the State agency administering the State program under this part; or
(B) if the individual is subject to such a plan and is not incapacitated, participate in such work activities (as defined in section 607 (d) of this title) as the court, or, at the option of the State, the State agency administering the State program under this part, deems appropriate.
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Does your tiny mind understand this? This means that if you are behind in your support, do not duck those calls, go down to the state and take your paperwork showing why you are in arrears and work something out. And if you are unable to work? You can show them that!
Most of the time it is people who refuse to go to court (and in some cases, I can see why, court is terrifying) who get those orders sending them to jail. But you have to adult up and get your ass down there to work it out because it is not about YOU or YOUR EX, it is about your CHILD.
From what I gathered from Wikipedia, the Bradley amendment only prohibits retroactive reductions in payment, meaning that payments that are already past due can’t be reduced. It says nothing about future payments, so if you know you can’t afford the payments I’m pretty sure you can request an alteration without the Bradley amendment having anything to do with it.
Now, some people might find themselves overwhelmed by the legal process, which is why I think affordable legal assistance should be provided when necessary, but this something that is common to the whole legal system, it is in no way unique to child support payments.
*this is something
So here’s the thing about Darryl’s rant. “Excessive” is inherently a subjective thing, so where do these numbers come from, and how were they arrived at? Who decides what’s excessive? Also, 30K a year sounds like it’s probably a lot less than it actually costs to raise 2 kids (obviously this will depend heavily on where the kids live, but where I live that sounds totally reasonable). And then there’s the fact that a person who is divorced can’t commit adultery unless the person they’re sleeping with is married, on account of that whole “divorced” thing meaning that they are no longer married.
Shorter version - you’re being completely unreasonable.